Why American's don't care about soccer

I don't ever write about sports, mostly because I think it bores most of you who actually read this blog, but with the World Cup just completing and hearing very little about a sport that is fanatically worshiped everywhere else in the world I wondered why or how we Americans just don't care. And believe it or not, I have a theory. I, as probably many of you, played soccer as a kid (I was designated to goalie because I was tall -- which I really liked, I didn't have to run all around or really even know what was going on, I just had to pray that our fullbacks were good enough to kick the ball away from the goal because there little chance I was going to block a shot. But somehow merely playing the game doesn't translate into following the game in our later lives. By and large soccer in America is purely a childs game. The sport that rules all other sports in America is football, pro football to be exact. Its a multi-billion dollar business that infiltrates our entire economic market. We worship the teams and the coaches and above all, the players. But, there is one position in football that no one is really a fan of at all. The Kicker. The lowly kicker, however necessary to the game, is thought of as a position for pansies. Men who go out 3 times in a game, in their little pads and little helmet who kick field goals and extra points and if a player gets the slightest bit close to them fall down on the ground flalling about as if a grizzly bear had devoured their leg. Mellowdrama. In sports (aside from WWF) we loathe melodrama. If anyone has ever watched a World Cup match, or even MLS (Major League Soccer) game they will soon be introduced to "the flop". Basically the exact same mellowdrama of the football kicker - lots of squirming and writhing on the ground in agony to garner the favor of an official (followed within a matter of seconds a miraculous recovery). I believe this melodrama alone is the reason we American's refuse to watch a single minute or waste an ounce of breath on soccer. Sure we'll play it for fun, or let our kids play, but when it comes to spending our time in front of the TV, pouring our emotions into a team and sport -- soccer is just for melodramatic pansies.